29 September 2011

a moment of honesty

It is almost 1am and I really don't have much to write about.  I know I said that I was going to work on sorting through photos from the last few months and would be sharing them here all week.  The truth is I have lots of great ideas and photos and other things to share.  I just can't bring myself to do it.

If I am going to be completely honest the reason is that I'm struggling.  I have come to the conclusion that while all deployments suck, I was much better at coping with them alone compared to with a toddler.  I am not trying to whine or compare my problems with anyone else's.  All I am saying is that this has been a total struggle for the last few months and I feel like I am losing the battle.

So please forgive me when you stop by here and things haven't been updated for a few days.  I'm trying, I really am.  It just seems that despite my best efforts my butt is getting kicked.

2 comments:

  1. Jess you guys have been on my prayer list, but I will lift you up tonight and make sure you're on my prayer partners lists as well. *hugs* God gave you this path because he knows how strong you are. I pray things will get easier for you. Always remember I'm here for you to vent (Lord knows I've vented a lot to you, thanks for listening!!)anytime you need :-)

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  2. Almost a year ago my husband and I completed our first deployment. We have no kids. I was envious of my friends with kids because they never had to eat alone, always had someone with them, etc, they were envious of me. I could come and go as I pleased. If I wanted to go out of town, I just went, etc. What I am trying to say is that you nailed it....DEPLOYMENTS SUCK! The grass is always greener on the other side. You have been on both sides...if you want to say that it is tougher with a child by all means SAY IT! Your childless friends will understand. If you want to say that it was tougher without Mabry by all means SAY IT! Your "mommy friends" will understand. Looking back at the deployment, I definitely feel like I had it "less tough" then my friends with kids.

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